When I first met Jason we were both 16 he was the class clown and the guy most called gay. We were standing in the lunch line and I if it bothers his they say he is gay. He said it because he offered to do gay stuff to them but they chickened out. He won't mind the name but he really hasn't done enough gay stuff to be gay yet.
I must admit I was a bit obsess with the idea naked. With my pretend x-ray vision I was comparing everyone's body parts. Yes both boys and girls. One needs to know what you have is not abnormal. So that night at the kitchen table over dinner I asked.
Me - When I was bore was everything normal?
Mom - You were early and we were not ready. You made up your mind and the next thing I knew you were in my arms.
Me - I mean there was not a dead twin brother, lack of oxygen to my brain, mangle or deformed private parts, was I blue or yellow?
Dad - Has something happen to your privates you need to have them looked at?
Mom and I freak... By a medical person I don't care. Dad added. Then he went off on rant about dad and son being able to talk about some things like sex, and or girls, bla, bla, bla.
Me - I said I met and made my first gay friend today at school. Dad turned white as a sliced bread. Mom wanted his name address and parents phone number.
Dad - Is my sixteen year old son considering letting a gay guy do gay stuff to him? (my mom screamed) She left the dinner table and went up stairs to their bedroom.
Me - Is that a bad idea?
Dad - Are you gay?
Me - I don't think so. It was just an offer that it was available if I wanted to check it out. He says he is gay but has no one to do gay stiff with.
Dad - If you seriously thought you were gay this would be a different conversation. Just checking things out you run the risk of being gay forever. People will make you out to be that gay kid and make your life hell. What is the rush?
ME - No rush just questions. Now that you and mom are forty how often do you guys have sex?
Dad - That is a two person secret ask your mother she will say none of your business.
Me - She said You guys only did it five times and then she got pregnant, and you never did it since. That straight people only do it to make babies.
Dad - OMG - That would be a reason to go gay and that is your mother being ... your mother and not nearly aceturate. How about you consider this. sex is something private between two people. It should be equal participation by both parties. Otherwise you are just using your friend for your own pleasure.
Me - You grown up take something simple like two guys fooling around and make into life and death.
Dad - If you think your gay friend does not have feeling for the guys that says yes your are fooling yourself. He is telling people he is looking hoping someone anyone says yes. That is when he falls in love.
ME - Wow I can totally see that. How do you know so much about this?
Dad - I was doing gay stuff with a guy for about three weeks, then your mother changed my mind. Which is also why she is freaking out so much. If I was gay you would not be here.
Jason and I would hooked up years after high school and after my first divorce. While I got to say I was kind of grateful for that opportunity to try normal, having two kids was a gift that made finding love with Jason worth waiting for. My Parents like me and the kids love Jason so much better. Mom tells everyone my first wife was crazy and I am better off gay and with Jason. She did set the house we lived in one fire when we were all sleeping, and she will be up for parole in fifteen years. She hears voices of mostly of Marvel Super Hero's telling her to do crazy things. My mom and dad thought she was perfect back then.
Some Boys - Story Time Blog
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