Chance turned sixteen in June and has been fighting with his mother and me over coming out as gay. He will tell you he has always felt he is gay. We have caught him with a few boys when he was fourteen. I tried to convince him he was more than gay. He started lifting weights and running. He spent the last two year doing everything he can not to not look gay just to then come out as gay.
We should have record the conversation over dinner. The point of coming out it to meet others just like yourself. We had a sixteen year old tells us he want to... do gay stuff with other boys. His mother being the romantic person in the family was thinking how hard is to have a gay relationship and was not grasping the full picture. Then Chance got descriptive about what is really hard and why he needs a boyfriend. She screamed. Went a little crazy which stuck me and my gay son to clean up after dinner. A chore we both hated.
He spent most of the time apologizing for being gay. Explaining it was a surprize to him to and the last direction he was headed. Then he said it's not a choice for him to be happy he want to share it. Should it really matter what sex they are to anyone but me?
I ask smart people I knew how to handle this cause I already feel guilty for him being gay in the first place. It did not help that they said they would need a lot more info to place blame. What ever happened to born this way?
With everyone's two cents we come to the conclusion it is not our choice to make. We live in a conservative community. I have the understanding there are two other gay guys at school that our out of the closet and they are a couple. It's not like there are going to be tons of gay boys coming out of the woodwork.
There is sixteen hundred students,, a little over seven hundred boys. That's about 175 male students per grade. The CDC says the number of LGBTQ students went from 11 percent in 2015 to 26 percent in 2021. One in four male students said they were gay. Two points, not the only dad with a gay son (whew), and things have changed so much since I went to school.
A week before school starts he comes out on facebook. Everyone in the family had a cell phone and within twenty minutes they all were blowing up. This continued for a week. Insane because people loved my son, and want him to be happy. Guys were running for their lives admitting he was hot. People were commenting on other people comments. A few religious groups did not like the discussion about sixteen year old gay boys and then it got political.
The day before school the School board Member for our district called to ask if we thought he would need extra security the first few days at school. I asked if threats were being made. She said no but you never know with these things. This is me telling the media. Someone should do an after school movie how how it is for straight parents to deal with gay kids coming out. They get to be gay in the end, and I am still just the dad with a different son then I thought I had for the first 14 years.
Then the end of week one is a pizza in the park after school for students and families a fundraiser for the PTA. We are all there. Then this kids walks over and introduces himself. His name is Taylor, and he want us to know he has a crush on our son. Then he asks if we thought it would be okay to tell him. The romantic starts crying and hides, I say Go for it.
This was the after school special part. Cute kid Taylor interrupts the frisbee throwing and said something to my son. They bump fists and they turn their back on everyone and start walking off. They stop turn to each and in front of the world start making out. They stop sit down in the grass and start talking to each other. They kiss occasionally as we all watch them from a distance.
They end up laying down across from other talking. Chance rolls over on top and well basically shoves his tongue down Taylor throat who is begging for more. They stop and Chance looks my direction from fifty yards away we make eye contact. He smiles gives Taylor a kiss and then helps him stand up. They head my direction and my wife is still crying due to he birth of her gay son officially coming out and proving to all of us. Love is Love. I start searching the sky for rainbows.
They went to talk to Taylor parents first. After about three minutes there was a whole family approaching for introductions. Step two : Anaragments and permissions for overnight sleepovers was part of the acceptance process. Step three: Admitting we all know that are gay and doing it. We had no idea at the time we would be best friends and related one day.
Chance and Taylor would both remind me for the rest of my life nothing happens until you say something. You got to come out first then things get so much better because you are free to love the one you want. He is not my kid anymore. He is my one Chance who taught me more about life and love than I could ever teach him. I am just proud to be Chance's dad.
One Chance - Story Time Blog
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